Dogs doing lists #1: Beatlemania
- Dogs dousing themselves in gasoline and marching across Abbey Road engulfed in flames.
- Dogs emerging from beneath the sheets at a John and Yoko bed-in, turning the wind-up key embedded in their spine, and repeating, “I am the walrus.”
- Dogs thinking, “Will you still greet me—when I’m 64??” as their eyes bulge urgently from their undiscovered, mummified corpse.
- Dogs occupying the Brady Bunch grid, rotating their heads in synchrony and groaning in off-kilter unison, “I buried Paul.”
- Dogs bowing over the guitar, strumming the opening chords of “Helter Skelter,” and slurring into the microphone, “This is for all you Charles Manson fans out there.”
- Dogs posing on a rooftop in a sleeveless New York City shirt with Mark David Chapman’s head screwed loosely onto their neck.
- Dogs stretching Ringo Starr’s face over a bass drum and pedaling the mallet with his tongue.
- Dogs covering the microphone and whispering to Ed Sullivan in front of a live studio audience, “It will be thought not ladylike to have it performed in the natural manner.”
- Dogs screaming from their very depths as the Beatles take the stage at Shea Stadium, and fainting, at their last gasp, into the outstretched arms of Chairman Mao.
- Dogs directing a mob of screaming teenagers toward an abattoir, chaining the doors, and screaming into an absent camera, “Beatlemania!”
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